damn sick......

Now I really wished I could just die.
'Cos I'm having painful tonsils, coughing like I contracted tubercolosis and wheezing away as if there's no tomorrow.
Gahh!!!
And I can't even speak now!
I've turned into a dumb girl.
Can you imagine a chatty girl who likes to laugh keeping silent and still?!
This is ridiculous!
Urrgghh!!!
My bones and muscles ache too......
I hate these......
Someone help me!
All the doctor say was "Amanda, you've got to drink more water and rest more."
Can't they understand I cannot afford to rest at this point of time where I have 2 more teaching proposals to finish?!
I almost dug my brains out to think of interesting activities for my teaching proposals okay!
Hmph!
Make me so agitated leh!

torturing tonsils

I am so exhausted.
There were literally a hill load of assignments waiting for me.
My tonsils are swollen and they hurt like hell.
I hate it when my tonsils swell, they hurt so much.
Yet, they swell easily.
Bad tonsils.
Hmph!

behind every comedy is a tragedy

I went for my favourite movie-alone outing yet again.
This time it was at The Picturehouse.
There were less than ten people in The Picturehouse, and most of them were the whites.
Yet, I felt strangely warm and comfortable in there.
I reckon it's the khaki-coloured seats and soft yellow lightings that made the whole cinema so homely yet elegant.
Oh, and you know something? Before the movie starts, they played jazz and it was really soothing to the soul.

The movie I caught was a french film: "Molière".
Jean-Baptiste Poquelin also known as Molière, I've learnt about him when I took up Acting and Directing. Well, it was his name I heard of but not really his story.
Today, it seems that I added depth to my knowledge of Molière.
The french film showed the life of the famous french comedian cum dramatist, the obstacles he deal with, the love he gave and the sacrifice he made.
At the same time, I saw the passion he had for theatre and the woman he loved so dearly.
It's so hard to put down in words everything I watched in The Picturehouse, but I have to say that the life of Molière is one that I would like to experience.
The ups and downs of life and the emotions that we go through are the things that make life valuable.
I believe behind every comedy, comes with a tragedy or something that touch the human hearts so deeply that one will be able to remember it for life.
There was a scene where Molière's lover was dying, at her deathbed she requested Molière to make her laugh.
Molière's reply was, " How do you expect me to make laughter out of a situation that expects me to weep?"
And do you know what his lover said?
"If that's the case, invent it."
I was so touched by the whole film that tears just rolled down my cheeks without me knowing.
And the main lead, Romain Duris, is so HANDSOME!!!
I strongly recommend this movie to everyone, it's totally lovely.

Acting is the profession of sensitivity, not appearance.

鱼尾纹是快乐的象征

今天跟同学们吃午饭的时候，我不停地大笑。
可能，我真的非常地爱笑吧。
当我大笑的时候，总是感到那么的自然，好像有一股渴望自由的欲望随着笑声爆发出来。

萍说：“你笑什么笑啦？在笑的话，就满脸鱼尾纹咯！”
我：“哎呀，难道你不懂鱼尾纹是快乐的象征么？哈哈哈！”

对呀，鱼尾纹对我来说并不是什么好担心的事情，其实我觉得越多鱼尾纹越好，因为那代表我一生都很快乐，即使遇到挫则，我还是那么豪放地笑着，面对人生百态。
所以啊，我并不介意每天大笑，脸上浮现鱼尾纹，因为我知道我快乐。
大家，不要害怕在脸上表现自己的情绪。
想笑的时候就大笑吧，想生气破口大骂的时候就骂吧，想哭的时候就让眼泪自然地滑下脸颊吧！
根本就不用在意别人怎么看你，因为每个人都有表达自己的机会与自由。
做回自己，让自己快乐些。

好困，我要睡觉了。
明天还要测验呐，讨厌死了！
Wish me luck manz.

自己

我知道有时候自己的思想很荒谬。
友人都说我是疯子，因为我的思维跟一般人不一样。
我脑子里都装着一些奇奇怪怪的东西。
我常常会有很多疑问而且很多思想都是在挑战社会规矩。
或许，我只是从不同的角度看待同一样事情。
但是，不是每个人都能理解。
我不怪他们，因为有时候，我也不太了解自己。
但是，我不觉得自己有任何错，我也不为自己的观念和行为感到羞愧。
因为，我相信每个人都是个体，思想不通、观念不同，不能把自己的一套理念套在另一个人的身上。
那样对两方都不公平，人们没有思想的能力，也失去了选择的权利。
所以，我喜欢自己与自己所作的一切。

trust in Him

Jesus comforts His followers.

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in Me."
John 14:1

Rain, in the train

I was extremely embarrassed that I wet my bosom with beads of tears this afternoon, on the train to school.
With my earplugs of my mp3 stuck in my ears, I was listening to a pretty upbeat song. So actually it should be quite weird to weep with such a song.
However, it was apparently what I did.

I received a message on my mobile.
It was from my brother who was in camp.
He told me that the whole platoon was punished because of some sabo king.
Even though he had a hard time in there, he didn't fail to ask me to take good care of myself and not tire myself out.
It was then I felt a strong surge of emotions in me, and puddles just formed in my eyes.
In a split second, my eyes just could not contain my tears and they just ooze out like the rain drops outside the train.
Immediately, I lowered my head and squeezed my eyes tight to avoid the other passengers' shocked looks, and that was when I saw blotchy spots on my bosom and my v-neck tee.
It was then that I realised I felt more secure and alive with my brother around, whether outside or in the house.
He understands me, stands up for me and protects me, he's my best friend.

I wiped away my tears soon enough but the emotions in me sure lingered for quite awhile.
I will be alright after a good cry.
I have Jesus with me.
Art, remember, you have Jesus with you too.

Father God, You're my Redeemer and Friend. And You're forever with me, pour down Your comfort upon me, Lord. I need You.

with character and attitude

Junn and I went to Kinokuniya for Li Xie's book launch this afternoon.
I adore her and the stuff she wrote.
She is one woman with attitude and character.
非常地我行我素。
She signed on my book with a very creative signature.
I strongly encourage all to read her book, 《留下你的死人头》。
The title may sound a little morbid, but it's just her, you know.
Unique and outstanding from the rest.


The host:黄文鸿 and the author of 《留下你的死人头》:李邪。

I met up with my Art, Lou and Zac in the evening, at the Cathay.
There's a candy floss machine at the entrance of Cathay, I went up and took a look.
I love it when the fluffy floss go round and round the machine, I could feel the rhythm by just staring at it.
Then, this beefy guy with curly hair handed me a stick of candy floss.
Immediately, like a little girl, I gave a little squeal of delight and thank him for it.
I stood beside him and let the candy floss vanished on my tongue.
Soon, I realised he looks good because he has a very kind face, I mean, I could see kindness in his eyes as he hand out sticks of candy floss to people around.
A smile lingered on my face, I think this is what it means when people say that a person will look good when he/she has a heart of gold.

Guess I'll go brew some chamomile tea, well, as all of us should know by now, I'm in a battle with insomnia.

chinese grammer part II

Alright, I just reached home.
Like, finally I ended my chinese grammer test.
Whee!~
Well, it wasn't too difficult lah.
Though I was kinda nervous while doing the test, but I found out that most of my answers were correct.
Checked my notes immediately after I hand in the papers, you know.
Great, it's time for me to rest now.
I'm going to oikos tonight.
Can't wait!
=)

chinese grammer

Gawd, chinese grammer is killing me.
I pray that I don't fail my test tomorrow.
And I hope for good results, in fact.
Who doesn't aim for high marks?
I do, in fact I desire for the best and I'm not ashamed of this desire.
Sometimes, I get a lil' ambitious, but it's never a bad thing.
At least I don't think so.
No, wait.
In fact, I'm proud of being so.
Hah, that's just me lah.

Alright, now back to mugging.
Potato-Arse, I hate you for this.
You better pay back by giving me better marks.
Pfft! -scowls-

insomnia

I just want to come here and write something.
Tired lah.
But too much things on my mind, I'm having insomnia.

random leh

I'm so sleepy yet my mind can't stop tossing and turning.
I have a test tomorrow and I'm supposed to be in bed now, but just not able to sleep.
Sigh.
Maybe I could do with a Long Island right now, with some loud music.

I'm still pondering whether I should move into hostel next year.
You know, I can really save the trouble, time and energy of traveling to and fro.
And independent living suits me fine.
Hostel is an attractive choice for me.

Gawd, I needa catch some sleep.
My head hurts.
Long Island is definite for me.
Maybe......this coming Wednesday?