my dreams. my youth. my time.

my greatest dream is to be a famous performance artiste.
if you want me to give up all dreams and choose only one,
this will be the one i choose.
sometimes i'm so tempted to seize the day and run away from home
and go all out to some other country where i can realise my dream.
sometimes i feel that i am losing my youth lustre, my years.
as if i'm wasting my beauty, my skills and my talent.
sometimes the passion in me is so strong, i have to curb it for fear it'll explode and stir up the impulsiveness in me.
i know the more i curb, and as the years pass,
slowly, cowardice and cynicism turn in.
i'm afraid the fire will cease and gradually somehow,
it'll be put out.
someone, something,
fan the fire in me.
fan it so strong that i can burn wildly.
so wild that i can melt everyone's heart.

today's my honey's birthday.
Happy Birthday to you, my honey dear!
;)
love you sooOoooOOoo much!
muackzz!
*giggles*

people around me think that i'm too high profile.
too diva-ish.
and oblivious and unobservant.
but i do not do it on purpose,
i just like to have fun and laugh so much that i just concentrate on enjoying them.
no evil intentions, no hard feelings.
really.

people know that somehow i emits that "aura",
cos nobody puts DivaBaby in a corner.

this morning he went to tioman to dive.
i woke up and i realised my heart went along with him.
i told my parents i want to go to tioman cos i miss him.
my parents thought i was crazy.
LoL.
i admit i am.
yes, i am.

my mind is in a turmoil now.
i just need to see you really do something for me,
my heart will totally be there,
ready to integrate our lives.

people around me question me,
why is it that i did not choose someone who gave me everything?
why did i choose you?
people waited for me, did so much for me, give in to me..
yet i choose you.

people around me object, i go against their objections.
i STILL choose you.
got caught in the middle between my family and you,
still never give us up.

how come?
why?
you go and think.

yesterday i had a long day.
reached school at 8am for marketing class.
when i was in the lift, there was this weird man kept looking at me and smiled at me.
at that point of time i cant remember who is he, so i just smiled back without saying hi.
when i get out of the lift then i realised he's the man who fixed my laptop.
hahaha..

my honey came over during my lunch break.
LoL.
he look totally like a poly student lah.
felt so much happier after seeing him.
we went to bukit timah plaza for a drink and we chat.
then we walked all the way back to my school, under the hot sun.
but we're happy.
muackz!

then after my presentation skills lecture, jun wei tapped my shoulders and said "Yun Lei, it's been a long time since i last saw you. we'll talk one day yeah." and i agreed and show him my sunshine smile again.
i'm kinda surprised he came over and talked to me.
cos normally he's the cool cool handsome teacher..you know..

i went over to Sao Paolo Cafe to buy some food while waiting for louis to come and meet me.
guess who i met?
Stanley-my JiaMing BiaoGe..
i'm his WanJun BiaoMei..
LoL.
we always role play with each other lah..
funny right..hahahaha..
that's why i always get discount for the food i get there.
well, stanley came over to talk to me.
told him i'm taking marketing module.
his favourite subject i realised.
he taught me some stuff about marketing.
good huh..
;)

louis came shortly after that, then we saw "wins", he thinks that i look sweet and pretty eh.
hurhur...
*head swells*
louis and i took bus 156 from clementi to sengkang.
the journey is damn long lah.
louis ask me to catch some rest so i slept through the journey.
then we meet up with jocelyn at sengkang's Cold's Storage to buy the ingredients for our cooking and drinking session.
we took a cab down to jocelyn's cousin's (janice) house.
damn that cabby lah!
he gave that irritating attitude to jocelyn.
louis and i were so damn furitated!
dont know how jocelyn could be so calm.
GRRRRR!!!!!

when we reached janice's house, we start washing, cutting, chopping and stuff..
chef Ong(jocelyn) and chef Poh(louis) did most of the work..
i'm their personal assistant.
which means i wash the stuff..and when they say "pass me the tomatoes", i'll make sure the tomatoes land in their hands.
when they say"close the fridge", i'll make sure the door of the refridgerator is shut tightly.
i dont really know how to cook so i become P.A. loh..
but i sliced mushrooms and diced tomatoes!!!!
hahahaha..!
my friends are so proud of me, im proud of myself too!

then after dinner, we drank Smirnoff vodka and played some games.
i drank the most 'cos im the strongest drinker amongst them all.
all of them faces red so fast loh.
LoL.
got a hangover today, woke up with a headache.
but i went back to sleep and felt much better.

Louis, can start preparing for christmas party and my farewell party le lah..
sigh..

i'm back to school.
like finally.
it's great to meet my crazy friends again!!!
and my cute lecturers!!!
...hurhur...esp ray!!!
he smiled at me on my first day back!!!
then he turned to me and said "Hi, Yun Lei."
mwahahahahahaha!!!!!
ray, you know!! it's RAY!!!
all the gurls are crazy about him, we ogle at him during class.
LoL.

this semester i'm taking 6 modules.
-Global Issues
-Contemporary Chinese Language
-Interpretation
-Presentation Skills
-New Media (something like photography)
-Marketing
stress manz...but challenging and fun...i like...

Louis, tell me about it manz.
i'm 18 too.
i want to live the way i want too.
like you, i hope to go away also.
one day i'll fly away, we'll break free.
and we'll just get away from this freakin' place that caged us in.
one day...one day....